Understanding Crazy Making: How It Happens and Its Impact on Your Mental Health 

Understanding Crazy Making: How It Happens and Its Impact on Your Mental Health 

What is Crazy Making?

Crazy making is a form of psychological manipulation that distorts reality, leaving victims feeling confused, emotionally drained, and doubting their own perceptions. It often occurs in relationships with narcissists or other manipulative individuals who use a series of tactics to create instability and maintain control over their victims. These tactics include gaslighting, denial, projection, shifting blame, and contradictory behavior, making it difficult for the victim to distinguish between truth and manipulation (Psychology Today).

How Crazy Making Works

The primary goal of crazy making is to destabilize the victim’s perception of reality. Some common tactics used by manipulators include:

  • Gaslighting: This involves denying facts, twisting events, and making the victim question their memory and sanity (Psychology Today).

  • Contradictory Statements: The manipulator frequently changes their stance or tells conflicting stories to create confusion.

  • Blame Shifting: They refuse accountability and place the blame on the victim, making them feel responsible for the manipulator’s actions.

  • Projection: Accusing the victim of behaviors the manipulator is actually engaging in, making it difficult for the victim to defend themselves.

  • Emotional Manipulation: Playing on the victim’s emotions, alternating between affection and cruelty to keep them on edge.

  • Silent Treatment & Withholding: Ignoring the victim or withholding affection as a means of control and punishment (National Domestic Violence Hotline).

The Psychological Impact of Crazy Making

Being subjected to crazy making can have profound and lasting effects on a person’s mental health, including:

  • Chronic Stress and Anxiety: Constant confusion and self-doubt create a high-stress environment that can lead to anxiety disorders.

  • Depression: The emotional toll of feeling invalidated and powerless can contribute to depression and low self-worth.

  • Cognitive Dissonance: The victim struggles to reconcile contradictory information, leading to mental exhaustion.

  • Loss of Self-Trust: Continuous manipulation erodes the victim’s confidence in their own judgment and perceptions.

  • PTSD and C-PTSD: Prolonged exposure to crazy making can lead to post-traumatic stress disorder, especially in cases of ongoing emotional abuse (Verywell Mind).

Recognizing and Protecting Yourself from Crazy Making

Awareness is the first step in breaking free from crazy making. Here are some strategies to protect yourself:

  1. Trust Your Perceptions: If something feels off, trust your instincts. Keep a journal to document conversations and events.

  2. Set Boundaries: Clearly define what behaviors you will and will not tolerate. Enforce consequences for boundary violations.

  3. Limit Engagement: Minimize interactions with manipulators and avoid arguing with them, as they thrive on control and chaos.

  4. Seek Support: Reach out to trusted friends, family, or a therapist for validation and guidance.

  5. Practice Self-Care: Engage in activities that promote mental well-being, such as meditation, exercise, and mindfulness.

  6. Educate Yourself: Understanding manipulation tactics can empower you to recognize and counteract them effectively.

Final Thoughts

Crazy making is a dangerous psychological manipulation tactic that can leave victims feeling lost, confused, and emotionally drained. Recognizing the signs and taking proactive steps to protect yourself can help you regain control over your mental well-being. You deserve clarity, validation, and healthy relationships. If you’ve been affected by crazy making, seeking professional support can help you heal and rebuild your confidence.


Tags: #CrazyMaking #Gaslighting #PsychologicalManipulation #MentalHealth #NarcissisticAbuse #EmotionalAbuse #SelfCare

Healing Mantras & Breathwork for Narcissistic Abuse Recovery

Healing Mantras & Breathwork for Narcissistic Abuse Recovery

Breaking free from narcissistic abuse requires not just mental reframing but also physical grounding. By pairing these powerful mantras with intentional breathing exercises, you can reinforce your healing process and regulate your nervous system.

Mantra & Breathwork Practice

Each mantra below is paired with a specific breathing technique to enhance its impact. Practice these daily in a quiet space, allowing yourself to fully absorb their healing energy.


1. Letting Go of Responsibility

Mantra: “I am not responsible for the narcissist’s actions or behaviour. I am only responsible for my own healing and well-being.”
Breathwork: 4-7-8 Breathing (Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 7 seconds, exhale for 8 seconds)
Purpose: Releases anxiety and resets your nervous system.


2. Affirming Self-Worth

Mantra: “I am worthy of love, respect, and healthy relationships. I deserve to be treated with kindness, empathy, and understanding.”
Breathwork: Heart-Centered Breathing (Inhale deeply while imagining love entering your heart, exhale releasing self-doubt)
Purpose: Cultivates self-love and confidence.


3. Reclaiming Identity

Mantra: “I am not defined by the narcissist’s perception of me. I am my own unique, authentic self, and I will honour and embrace my true identity.”
Breathwork: Box Breathing (Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4)
Purpose: Grounds you in your true self.


4. Setting Boundaries

Mantra: “I will set healthy boundaries to protect myself from further harm. I have the right to say ‘no’ and prioritize my own well-being.”
Breathwork: Lion’s Breath (Inhale deeply through your nose, exhale strongly through your mouth with a ‘ha’ sound)
Purpose: Releases tension and empowers assertiveness.


5. Releasing the Need for Validation

Mantra: “I release the need for approval and validation from the narcissist. I am enough just as I am, and I don’t need their validation to feel worthy.”
Breathwork: Alternate Nostril Breathing (Close right nostril, inhale through left; switch nostrils and exhale)
Purpose: Balances emotions and promotes inner peace.


6. Taking Back Control

Mantra: “I will not allow the narcissist to control or manipulate me any longer. I am in charge of my own life and choices.”
Breathwork: Power Breathing (Inhale deeply through nose, exhale forcefully through mouth)
Purpose: Builds strength and personal empowerment.


7. Practicing Self-Care

Mantra: “I will practice self-care and self-compassion. I deserve to prioritize my own physical, emotional, and mental well-being.”
Breathwork: Ocean Breath (Ujjayi) (Inhale and exhale through nose with slight throat constriction)
Purpose: Soothes and calms the mind.


8. Releasing Self-Blame

Mantra: “I will not blame myself for the narcissist’s behaviour. I did not cause it, and I cannot change it. I will focus on my own healing and growth.”
Breathwork: Sighing Breath (Deep inhale through nose, loud sigh on exhale)
Purpose: Releases stored guilt and tension.


9. Surrounding Yourself with Support

Mantra: “I will surround myself with supportive and healthy relationships. I deserve to be surrounded by people who lift me up and support my healing journey.”
Breathwork: Gratitude Breathing (Inhale gratitude, exhale negativity)
Purpose: Encourages connection and openness.


10. Embracing Resilience

Mantra: “I am resilient and capable of healing from the wounds of narcissistic abuse. I will take each step at my own pace and celebrate my progress.”
Breathwork: Deep Belly Breathing (Breathe deeply into the diaphragm, expanding belly)
Purpose: Strengthens inner resilience and calm.


Final Reflection:
Healing from narcissistic abuse takes time and conscious effort. Be patient with yourself, seek supportive relationships, and make self-care a priority. Combining these mantras with breathwork creates a powerful tool for reclaiming your strength, inner peace, and self-worth. You are not alone, and you deserve a life free from toxicity and full of love and self-empowerment.

The Profound Link Between Narcissistic Abuse, PTSD, and Mental Health Disorders

The Profound Link Between Narcissistic Abuse, PTSD, and Mental Health Disorders

Narcissistic abuse is a deeply harmful form of emotional and psychological manipulation that can leave lasting scars on its victims. Unlike physical abuse, narcissistic abuse is insidious and difficult to detect, making it harder for victims to understand the trauma they are enduring. This abuse often involves a range of manipulative tactics, including gaslighting, emotional blackmail, and constant devaluation, leaving the victim feeling confused, isolated, and powerless. As a result, many survivors of narcissistic abuse experience significant mental health struggles, including the development of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and other serious mental health disorders.

In this blog, we will explore the profound connection between narcissistic abuse and PTSD, delve into other mental health disorders commonly experienced by victims, and offer insights into the healing process. By understanding how narcissistic abuse contributes to these psychological issues, survivors can begin to reclaim their sense of self and find hope for recovery.

Understanding Narcissistic Abuse

Narcissistic abuse occurs in relationships where one individual exhibits narcissistic traits, such as an inflated sense of self-importance, a lack of empathy, and a constant need for admiration. Narcissists use emotional manipulation to control and dominate their victims, often employing tactics such as gaslighting, projection, and guilt-tripping. They seek to undermine their victim’s sense of self-worth and create an environment where the victim becomes dependent on the narcissist for validation.

Victims of narcissistic abuse may find themselves questioning their reality due to the narcissist’s manipulation. The constant criticism, emotional neglect, and psychological control can gradually erode the victim’s self-esteem, leaving them feeling trapped, worthless, and isolated. Over time, these abusive behaviors can contribute to the development of serious mental health issues, including PTSD.

The Link Between Narcissistic Abuse and PTSD

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is a mental health condition that arises after an individual experiences or witnesses a traumatic event. PTSD is commonly associated with events such as war, accidents, and natural disasters. However, narcissistic abuse, as a prolonged and insidious form of psychological trauma, can also trigger the onset of PTSD in its victims.

The emotional and psychological impact of narcissistic abuse is often far-reaching. The narcissist’s constant manipulation and gaslighting can create an overwhelming sense of confusion and doubt in the victim. The victim may feel like they are walking on eggshells, never knowing when the narcissist will erupt in anger or when they will be subjected to another round of emotional degradation. This creates a heightened state of anxiety and vigilance, which are hallmark symptoms of PTSD.

Symptoms of PTSD in Narcissistic Abuse Survivors:

  1. Intrusive Thoughts and Flashbacks: Victims may find themselves replaying traumatic events in their minds or experiencing flashbacks to moments of emotional abuse.

  2. Hypervigilance: Survivors may become excessively alert and on edge, constantly anticipating further abuse or danger.

  3. Nightmares: Recurrent, disturbing dreams related to the abusive relationship can disrupt sleep patterns and lead to sleep deprivation.

  4. Avoidance of Triggers: Victims may avoid certain places, people, or situations that remind them of the abuse, further isolating themselves.

  5. Emotional Numbing: Survivors may feel disconnected from their emotions or struggle to experience joy, happiness, or love.

  6. Mood Swings and Irritability: The stress and anxiety caused by the trauma may lead to emotional instability, including frequent mood swings.

The cumulative emotional toll of narcissistic abuse can create a psychological environment ripe for PTSD to develop. The trauma becomes embedded in the victim’s psyche, affecting their ability to trust themselves and others. This can lead to significant distress and disruption in their everyday life.

Other Mental Health Disorders Associated with Narcissistic Abuse

Beyond PTSD, narcissistic abuse is linked to a variety of other mental health disorders. The prolonged emotional manipulation and degradation experienced by victims can have far-reaching effects on their psychological well-being. Here are some of the most common mental health issues associated with narcissistic abuse:

1. Depression

The relentless emotional abuse and manipulation by a narcissistic partner or parent can lead to chronic feelings of sadness and hopelessness, ultimately resulting in depression. The victim’s self-worth may be systematically dismantled, leaving them feeling powerless and trapped in the relationship. As self-esteem erodes, victims may begin to believe that they are unworthy of love or happiness, which can contribute to depressive symptoms.

2. Anxiety

Living in a constant state of emotional turmoil can lead to heightened anxiety. Narcissistic abuse often involves unpredictable outbursts, blame-shifting, and emotional neglect, which can leave victims feeling anxious and on edge. The fear of further criticism or retaliation can cause a heightened sense of unease, making it difficult for the victim to relax or feel safe.

3. Complex PTSD (C-PTSD)

While traditional PTSD often results from a single traumatic event, complex PTSD develops as a result of prolonged exposure to repeated traumatic experiences. Narcissistic abuse can create a cycle of ongoing emotional and psychological harm, leading to complex PTSD. Survivors of complex PTSD may struggle with issues such as emotional dysregulation, difficulty in forming relationships, and an overwhelming sense of hopelessness.

4. Low Self-Esteem and Self-Worth

Narcissistic abuse systematically undermines a victim’s sense of self. The narcissist’s constant criticism, belittling, and invalidation can cause the victim to internalize feelings of worthlessness. Over time, the victim may struggle with severe self-esteem issues, believing they are unworthy of love, success, or happiness.

5. Trust Issues and Relationship Challenges

Victims of narcissistic abuse often find it challenging to trust others in the aftermath of their experiences. The narcissist’s betrayal and manipulation create a deep sense of mistrust, making it difficult for survivors to establish healthy relationships in the future. The trauma may also result in difficulties with setting boundaries and recognizing healthy relationship dynamics.

The Path to Recovery and Healing

Recovering from the trauma of narcissistic abuse is a complex and deeply personal journey. However, healing is possible with the right support, resources, and strategies. Survivors of narcissistic abuse can take the following steps to reclaim their lives and begin the healing process:

1. Seek Support

One of the most crucial steps in recovery is seeking support. It is important for survivors to reach out to trusted friends, family members, or a therapist who can offer validation, understanding, and guidance. Joining support groups for survivors of narcissistic abuse can provide a sense of community and allow individuals to share their experiences with others who understand their pain.

2. Educate Yourself

Understanding the dynamics of narcissistic abuse is essential for survivors to break free from the cycle. Educating oneself about narcissism, emotional manipulation, and the psychological impact of narcissistic abuse can empower survivors to recognize the abuse and begin rebuilding their sense of self-worth.

3. Practice Self-Care

Prioritizing self-care is vital in the healing process. Survivors should focus on their physical, emotional, and mental well-being through healthy lifestyle choices, self-compassion, and self-nurturing activities. Engaging in mindfulness, yoga, or meditation can help calm the mind and restore emotional balance.

4. Set Healthy Boundaries

Establishing and maintaining clear boundaries is essential in protecting oneself from further abuse and building healthier relationships. Survivors should learn to assert their needs, say no, and set limits with toxic individuals to prevent further harm.

5. Seek Professional Help

For individuals experiencing severe symptoms of PTSD, depression, or anxiety, professional therapy can provide much-needed support. A mental health professional can offer tailored strategies and interventions to help survivors manage their symptoms and work through their trauma.

6. Engage in Self-Reflection

Self-reflection allows survivors to explore the patterns and dynamics that led to the abusive relationship. By engaging in self-awareness and self-compassion, survivors can begin to heal and prevent future abusive patterns from taking root.

Conclusion

Narcissistic abuse is not just emotionally devastating; it can also result in long-lasting mental health issues such as PTSD, depression, anxiety, and complex trauma. However, with the right tools, support, and self-compassion, survivors of narcissistic abuse can heal and reclaim their lives. It is essential for survivors to understand that recovery is possible and that they are not alone in their journey. By seeking help, educating themselves, and prioritizing self-care, individuals can rebuild their sense of self-worth and move towards a healthier, happier future.

If you or someone you know is experiencing narcissistic abuse, know that there is hope. Healing is a journey, and with the right support, you can emerge stronger and more resilient.

What should you do when you realise you are in a relationship with a narcissist who continues to lie and cheat?

What should you do when you realise you are in a relationship with a narcissist who continues to lie and cheat?

What to Do When You Realize You’re in a Relationship with a Narcissist Who Lies, Cheats, and Deceives

Introduction

Discovering that you’re in a relationship with a narcissist who repeatedly lies, cheats, and manipulates can be devastating. The realization often comes with deep emotional turmoil, self-doubt, and confusion. However, the most crucial step is deciding what to do next.

This article explores the immediate actions to take, the emotional and psychological challenges that come with such relationships, and the difficult choices you may face—whether to forgive, walk away, or remain in denial. It also highlights the dangers of calling out a narcissist and how to protect yourself if you decide to leave.


The First Step: Acknowledge the Truth

Many people, upon discovering their partner’s unfaithfulness, deception, and narcissistic traits, struggle with denial. Accepting that someone you love is incapable of true loyalty or empathy is painful. However, staying in denial only prolongs the suffering and keeps you trapped in a toxic cycle.

Consequences of Denial

  • Loss of self-worth: Continually justifying a narcissist’s behavior erodes your self-esteem and sense of self.

  • Emotional exhaustion: The repeated cycle of hope, betrayal, and emotional manipulation drains your mental and physical energy.

  • Increased control by the narcissist: The longer you tolerate deception, the more power they have over you.

  • Wasted time and opportunities: Every moment spent hoping for change is time lost on personal growth and healthier relationships.

If you catch yourself making excuses for their actions—such as blaming stress, childhood trauma, or external circumstances—pause and ask yourself: Would I accept this behavior from a friend? If the answer is no, then why tolerate it from a partner?


Prioritize Your Well-Being

Your mental, emotional, and physical health should be your top priority. Narcissistic partners thrive on breaking down your confidence and making you doubt your reality.

Self-Care Strategies

  • Establish a daily routine: Stability in your life helps counter the emotional chaos they create.

  • Engage in therapy or self-reflection: Talking to a therapist can help you regain clarity and rebuild self-worth.

  • Practice self-compassion: Remind yourself that their behavior is about them, not your worthiness.

By focusing on self-care, you slowly regain the strength to make rational decisions rather than emotional ones dictated by their manipulation.


Set and Enforce Boundaries

Narcissists hate boundaries because they limit their control. However, setting clear boundaries is crucial in protecting yourself.

How to Set Effective Boundaries

  • Be direct and firm: Clearly state what behavior you will no longer tolerate. Example: “If I find out you’ve lied again, I will leave.”

  • Expect pushback: Narcissists will test your limits. Stay firm.

  • Follow through on consequences: Empty threats only reinforce their behavior.

Dangers of Calling Out a Narcissist

Be aware that narcissists react poorly to being confronted. Calling them out may lead to:

  • Rage and retaliation: They may lash out verbally, emotionally, or even physically.

  • Smear campaigns: They might spread lies about you to friends, family, or even your workplace.

  • Love-bombing: In an attempt to regain control, they may shower you with attention and promises they’ll change—only to revert to their old ways.

If you fear their reaction, consider a gradual disengagement strategy rather than direct confrontation.


Seek Support

Isolation is one of the narcissist’s strongest weapons. They want you to depend on them alone. Breaking free starts with rebuilding your support system.

Who to Turn To

  • Trusted friends and family: Confide in those who will offer support without judgment.

  • Support groups: Many online and in-person communities offer valuable advice from those who have been through similar experiences.

  • Therapists specializing in narcissistic abuse: They can provide specific coping strategies tailored to your situation.


Document Their Behavior

If you anticipate a messy breakup, legal battles, or gaslighting attempts, keeping records is crucial.

How to Document Effectively

  • Keep a journal: Record instances of lying, cheating, manipulation, and abusive behavior.

  • Save texts and emails: If they try to deny their actions later, you’ll have proof.

  • Talk to witnesses: If friends or family have observed their behavior, their perspective could be valuable.

This documentation may also be helpful if you need legal protection, such as a restraining order.


Forgive, Move On, or Stay Stuck?

One of the hardest choices you’ll face is whether to forgive and stay, leave and move on, or remain in limbo.

Choosing to Forgive

Some people choose to forgive in hopes that their partner will change. However, narcissists rarely change unless forced by extreme consequences. Forgiveness without accountability allows them to continue their behavior.

Choosing to Move On

Leaving a narcissistic relationship is difficult but often the healthiest choice. If you choose to leave:

  • Have a safety plan: Ensure you have somewhere to go if you fear retaliation.

  • Go no-contact if possible: Cutting off communication helps break their hold over you.

  • Prepare for their attempts to reel you back in: They may beg, cry, or promise to change—don’t fall for it.

Choosing to Stay Stuck

Some people choose to stay in the relationship, unable to fully accept the truth. This often leads to:

  • Chronic emotional distress

  • Increased self-doubt and low self-esteem

  • A cycle of endless betrayals and broken promises

Remaining in denial only prolongs the inevitable and makes breaking free even harder later.


Protect Yourself If You Decide to Leave

Leaving a narcissist—especially one prone to deceit and cheating—can be dangerous. Protect yourself by:

  • Consulting a lawyer if you’re married or share assets.

  • Changing passwords and securing finances to prevent them from accessing your personal information.

  • Blocking them on all platforms to avoid manipulation and hoovering attempts.

  • Informing a trusted person about your plans to leave in case you need emergency support.


Conclusion

Realizing that you’re in a relationship with a narcissist who lies and cheats is painful, but what you do next will determine your future happiness and well-being.

You have choices:

  • Stay in denial and continue suffering.

  • Forgive without accountability and endure more betrayal.

  • Prioritize yourself, set boundaries, and break free.

Leaving is not easy, but neither is staying in a toxic cycle. You deserve honesty, respect, and love. Choosing yourself is not selfish—it’s necessary.

If you’re struggling, reach out to a professional who can help guide you through this process. You are not alone, and you have the strength to reclaim your life.